Simply Beautiful, or the "Amen" that never came...

[Lankin]

I am unsure about the title of the summary I am going to give a review, should I blog about it, which surely I will. But then, Biri's last blog note made me rather humble concerning my own, and even if I knew the pieces really really well this time, it doesn't make it any easier to write anything substantial, apart from ...

!!!asadfghjkl!!!

I guess I set my personal all-time record concerning "how to be a pest", as I was rather pushy, which normally I am not. I really didn't want to be a hold-up, and of course, I was. Bunny was busy d'awwwwing, so she was kind of half-speechless, but if I get nervous, I get talkative.

I still am, I notice. So, to the point:

Yes, he remembers you, @DecoSweetheart Most definitely, and I thought, I would be flattered, so I will report unabridged, and unaltered...

me: "I got this friend, Jennifer, and she's kind of shy, so.. she went to your concert in LA, Westwood, in October and she said she behaved a little strange... so I ..."

I wasn't able to built very concise or even correct English sentences at that point.

"I told her to send a picture, as probably those are not enough clues for you to remember."

So I showed him your picture, for about a second.

"Oh, I remember! She's a little ... nuts?"

*Saying this with a smile that may have suggested that you are not to be counted among the dangerous ones though

"Just stood there and ..." *eyes wide, jaw open*

me: "Yes! That her! She says hi, it's really important..."

Well, you're not alone... More tomorrow

[BabyBunny]

Now I'm sure that he also thinks I'm nuts... as my reaction was similar to that of Jennifer. And he will remember me as, the one who carries a bunny to the concerts, and who asked for an autograph for the bunny!

[Lankin]

And me as the one who talks way too much and is a terrible hold-up and.... argh!!!!

I want this done NOW! I already looked for tattoo studios in the vicinity on the web. I'll phone around tomorrow.

[DecoSweetheart]

Aaaah! I just saw this post today! Ok, I'm a little less mortified than I was upon reading this the first time...

Assuming, first of all, that he's not confusing me with someone else.. (He did have another concert in California following the one in L.A.)... A lot of people desire to be remembered.. It is possible that he didn't want to hurt my feelings.. But Lankin is quite sure that this is not the case...

Instant recognition... He didn't even have to think about it? Isn't that a little strange? Have I crossed his mind since that fateful day? (Hahaha, oh romantic fantasies...) I met him once.. today marks five months to the day.. and how many people has he met since then? I didn't say anything memorable.. I don't know how long I was standing there.. We didn't exchange that many words...

But let's say that he did remember...

I am fully aware of the weird facial expressions that I was making.. Though I am not sure that my jaw was literally hanging open..! Eyes wide at times, yes... He could only guess that I was nervous around him... If I had been nervous, then I could use that as an excuse.. But Philippe was easy to talk to.. down-to-earth.. My struggles had nothing to do with him... I thought that perhaps I had made him nervous... (Not because I had made any weird statements, though)

Ok, so... Philippe wouldn't deliberately be mean and tell one fan that another fan was "one card short of a full deck"... Since he's seen lots of other people acting abnormally around him, that shouldn't have made me particularly stand out... Lankin has assured me that I'm not in "lunatic territory".. And I can believe that he was only playing around.. Or maybe half-joking... Even if he does think that someone is mentally unstable, of course he would say it with a smile! He would never be anything but charming in a fan's presence...

Lankin and Bunny don't think I should feel bad since Philippe must think that they are MORE nuts... At least you know that he will remember you.. And well, I don't think that he takes things too seriously... But.. As I didn't ask for a "unique" autograph.. if he STILL remembers my weirdness.. doesn't that prove that I AM the *queen of awkward*!

However, everything that I've just said could be erased if... What if he was asking a question -- not making a statement. Lankin mentioned that I had "acted strangely".. So maybe he was just "filling in the blanks"... He was assuming that I had acted like the giddy, nervous, star-struck girls that he has encountered before... So what does he really remember...

It could be that he remembered me, but not my behavior... Maybe he remembered my "interesting" looks.. (I wish that I could say it's because I'm petite and cute, but I don't think that I'm considered a "babe"..) My chin sticks out...a lot (plastic surgery is in my future..) My teeth need to be fixed.. I am thin and pale.. I'm sure that I was wearing too much makeup... I hope that I didn't have lipstick on my teeth!

I'm not complaining... If I believe that I've been in his mind somewhere, then I'm flattered... And very importantly, it helps for when I write... Though, if Philippe ever sees some of the stuff that I write.. I don't know if that will help my case or hurt it...

I have had this itch.. ever since the day after I met him.. like I should express more to him.. give a fuller picture of who I am or something.. And then as time goes on, my confidence slips a little.. But now I feel that I am on the right track...

Whatever happened to the photo? It would've been nice if he had kept it..

[Lankin]

I didn't give it to him, only showed him, as I didn't want to put him to the decision to keep it or not. However, he remembers you at any rate

If we ever met I can render his facial expression more accurately -- he wasn't mean at any rate, not at all, and not depicting a hopeless fangirl either, totally awe-struck or something. He might even jumble things up, like what you said, or not -- I guess that would be the hardest thing in an autograph queue -- to assign people's words and faces some time after, as the basic situation is so similar, there is nothing that provides an additional clue.

But really, stop worrying I am sure he thinks of all of us, fondly, sometimes... before he goes to sleep, like ... *pressing face into the cushion, clapping hands over his ears... *What have I done to deserve this...*

[BabyBunny]

Jennifer, if this makes you feel better http://www.philippejarousskyfans.com/20 ... huh-hm-um/
This is what Lankin wrote when I met Philippe for the first time.

[Lankin]

It was the one post that caused my to instantly subscribe to Lydia's page "Do you need a slave?"

[DecoSweetheart]

Alas, as time ticks away, I slip into complete oblivion I have this fantasy in my head.. Like years from now, if we meet again.. I'll walk up to him.. my eyes down at first.. and I slowly look up.. And with a bit of a squint, he says, "Do I know you? Have we met before?"

But then I also think, well the world might end before I get that chance. I mean, I don't need to believe in the 2012 thing.. You just never know when something might happen, anyway!

Oh yes, Bunny, I saw that! No, I was a little more articulate than "um, er, sooo... *crickets chirping*" A decent amount of words were exchanged, I guess.

there is nothing that provides an additional clue

Oh, but there is! I'm the only one who gave him a hug that night, remember My mother thought I had been too bold.. But I gotta do what I gotta do! (This actually replayed itself in a dream, the one where Philippe was at my house.. When I felt that he was about to leave, I hastily grabbed his hand and kissed it.. And my mother was standing behind me, and she said exactly the same thing that she had said in real life, "Jennifer! " lol) Oh anyway, back to reality..

As I was standing in line, knowing that I didn't have time to think of anything clever to say, I thought, "You're going to at least ask him for a hug, if nothing else.." So after we talked for a bit, I asked.. He did say something [to himself?] before he stood up.. I didn't hear, but I keep imagining that he might have said something like, "Well, other people have asked me for worse.." I was about to say, "Oh that's ok, nevermind!" But then he stood up

Oh, and there was a point of miscommunication.. He said something to me, and I was like, "Oh.. what! " And I leaned in a little closer, but continued to "space out"... (Sometimes when people speak, my mind is like "sdklfsdjtu.." Omg, I am such an AIRHEAD hahaha)

So he repeated himself, and I think that I caught the words "friends" and "tonight".. Of course I wasn't going to make him repeat himself again... So I constructed the sentence in my head, thinking that he must be asking me "if I had friends with me here tonight"... So I looked at him (there were points where I could actually look him in the eye).. And I said, "I'm all alone".. And then HE was like, "What?" And I was like, "I'm all alone".. And he was like, "O.K."

Ahh.. I am a loner, but not one of those "weird loners" that's going to end up on the news!

"What have I done to deserve this" At least you know that you give him a laugh, Lankin! And the fact that Bunny asks for an autograph...for her bunny(!) is the most one-of-a-kind thing!

Now we just need to boost Bunny's confidence so that she is able to speak to him and afterwards be like, "Hellyeah, I nailed that s***, sucka!"

[Lankin]

Hmm, this is almost philosophical. I almost never feel like I said all, finally, to anyone worth talking to. There is always something for another time, or another situation.

I mean, I don't need to believe in the 2012 thing.. You just never know when something might happen, anyway!

My colleague at work reported he had sensed a glitch in the Matrix when Bunny and I met in real life.

Sometimes when people speak, my mind is like "sdklfsdjtu..

At work, mine is mostly like ... "*redundant bit of info, redundant bit of info, redundant, but very telling, *fact, thank you, *Oh why don't you just write an email.*"

In private, my mind is mostly crammed full with so many things that it is hard to even pay undivided attention to someone.

But meeting someone of special interest, yeah, my mind is like "asdfghjkl," or sometimes even like "_______________________".

Well, what I hope he doesn't think if he sees us is that we're all like, ...



I really think we aren't